Thursday, December 09, 2004

Veterinarian Bill - sigh

I'm beginning to wonder if it would be too expensive to get another dog/cat/animal. If the food bills aren't enough, the price of a veterinarian these days is enough to make me want to eat brussel sprouts instead of flinging them at ungrateful little mini me's running around in my house shouting "I'm gonna give you a wedgie!!!" Just read about this woman's story if you don't understand.

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"

The vet shrugged."I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20. But what with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up."

Hey....I didn't say it was a true story!!!!! Happy Thursday everyone!

7 Comments:

Blogger Melonie said...

Oh, Moogie you are so funny! I will have to fill you in later, but this is just the story I have needed. I have had my oldest dog to the vet 9 out of 11 days this week and she is scheduled to go back next week! Thank Goodness my vet is female of my husband would be sure that I was having an affair!

1:11 PM  
Blogger Chicka said...

Bwa ha haaaaa.... You're hysterical Moog! Keep 'em coming!

2:05 PM  
Blogger Sharon said...

This is hysterical! I was just on the verge of picking up the phone to tell Melonie to look at this post but I see she has beat me to it. :)

You are very funny! I love reading your blog.

5:20 PM  
Blogger Moogie said...

I'm glad you liked these. It was so bad it was good. I didn't even see it coming when I first read it.

5:53 PM  
Blogger Amelia said...

Huh?? What do you mean not a true story?.... ;)

11:28 PM  
Blogger Mellie Helen said...

*groan!* Aaaah, you got me on that one, Moogie! Well done! (Golly, do you think that might really be the reason why vet bills are so high? Hmm!)

2:39 AM  
Blogger Aussie Mama said...

Hilarious Moogie....very funny.

9:06 AM  

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